How dating has changed

My first/only experience with "dating" before I had my first girlfriend at 20 was in second or third grade. I had a crush on my classmate Melanie, a tall, blonde girl (funny, that's totally not my type today) from my class. I was so blinded by my infatuation with her that I even asked my friend Stefanie to "spy on her" so to speak, never realizing that said Stefanie actually liked me (which is ironic because I later liked her, but by then, she liked someone else). 

I sent Melanie a "love letter", asking her to go to the movies together. But she didn't respond (I think?). Or did we call? Gosh, I am blurry on the details. What I do remember is that during Communion preparation class, me and her and her friend met and talked and made plans. But because we were like 8 years old, none of us had any clue what to do next, so that's pretty much everything that happened.

Why I talk about it? Well, I just kept thinking for some time now how dating has changed over the years. It was never really easy and it always seems to be up to us men to make all the effort. But at least back then, it seems the competition was less, because other guys had to find creative ways or the courage to approach a girl. 

Well, that's pretty much gone now that every guy can just write every girl via Instagram or a dating app. Women are drowned in male attention where there was far less (although still a lot) in the past. 

It's actually mirroring other aspects of our society too. Movies for example. 25 years ago, you'd have to rent a video or DVDs to watch a movie. Sometimes you had to wait for years to see a certain movie on tv. It made it kind of an event. 

But now? You can stream 3 movies at once and barely pay attention while you play Candy Crush.

Same goes for music. I spent hundreds of hours, watching MTV, waiting for a certain song. I'd actually buy Maxi CDs with a single song I liked or an album. We didn't have Spotify and that made us appreciate the music more, celebrate it more.

At the stores, it was similar too. While there was always some selection, we didn't have so many options.

So dating is quite similar. There are far too many options, especially for women. With so many options, it reduces the role of a guy to "pallet cleaner". And likewise, due to the fact that most men will never succeed with 99,99% of women, the incentive to make any kind of effort approaches zero. If you never even get a response or get ghosted after 3-4 messages if you dare to get your hopes up, it only makes sense to try far less (although I still don't understand why most men are such simps and keep showering literally ANY female with a barrage of compliments, no matter if it's deserved). 

I also don't remember that there had been such a level of hostility between men and women when it comes to dating. I've been following some videos, news and articles on the topic and it seems that some men (I'd say the realistic ones) simply give up completely while the others think sucking up and simping is the way to go. 

Meanwhile, I remember a few female friends even sharing with me that their female friends complained and asked "why do men not approach us anymore?".

But even if dating or getting to know each other was easy...it seems that that has changed too. What's the point of it anymore? Just to meet up, boink as fast as you can and then see who is faster at blocking and ghosting the other person? 

I do get the appeal of a beautiful body. It's pleasing to the eye. But so are some shapes and colors, food, art. If I don't know or actually like the person IN that body, why would I want to be intimate with them?

And why is it so easy for men and women to be physically intimate, yet they are terrified to be EMOTIONALLY intimate?

Yeah, I don't understand dating. It was kind of fun when I met someone and we talked, we watched a movie at the cinema, had some food together and took our time. But it seems that those days are gone and it's going to be even worse...