The movie Matrix (which in return had heavily "borrowed" its ideas from Japanese anime) made us wonder: What's reality and what's the point?
Some of us seem to live in blissful ignorance. They are just happy with very little, maybe because they are not even aware that there are things they miss.
Then there are others. People who are more sensitive or aware. I unfortunately seem to be one of them. From a young age, I have experienced depression and eventually also anhedonia
(Anhedonia is explained well here:
https://youtu.be/DLnKanwAd_Q?si=4NUpPTYcZ2QGLvgo )
I often thought that if I was in the Matrix, I would also rather experience blissful ignorance. Reality is often harsh and can let life appear as pretty pointless.
Because what really is the point? Work? An education through schools? A status?
Those do not seem to be things that WE as humans really need. Those seem to be things that we are trained to pursue, because they create wealth and power for others. You can live life with little money, even without money. Education will help you to get a job, but it doesn't necessarily make you street-smart or helps you to survive.
If you spend years to get an education, then more years to pursue a job or career (where they will eventually replace you anyways), are you really serving yourself? Or are you serving the economy, the company and others? You don't get paid for charity, you get paid because you create a profit (people say an employee needs to bring in about 30% more than he costs).
So why do we do those things? Is it really our free will or is it learned? Is it ok to question it like I do?
I think I asked myself those questions since a younger age, because I felt underutilized or bored in school sometimes (although I didn't excel academically at all times) and because I felt an urge to think differently and swim against the current.
I tried to do things differently, probably in big parts due to my condition (the above-mentioned anhedonia and depression). I don't seem to find my "meaning" in life from chasing power, status or money. I felt happiest when I had instead good friends, a good relationship or (I assume) a family.
So I often thought that this is paramount: To find someone I like and can love. This person doesn't have to be perfect (neither am I), but should be open to reason and should have come to similar conclusions as I have (or think about it maybe).
We are social creatures. We have always been rather mobile as hunters and gatherers. We weren't made to sit in offices or planes or cars half our lives, but to go out there and to experience this planet, preferably with others.
That's already something that's very difficult to do (if you think about how tourism is streamlined and you barely have any "freedom" to discover anything anymore). And it's even harder in my opinion to find like-minded people. Just like in "The Matrix", many people seem to prefer to avoid to think how harsh reality might be or won't realize it until they're much older (or never). Maybe because they never experienced how soul-crushing and crippling it feels if you can't feel joy and lack hope or a goal in life.
Does it seem like I make my happiness depend on others if I think having a partner improves my life? Yes, I can see how people would think that. But we make our own happiness depend on others on a daily basis and more than we realize. Our whole civilization depends on others. On the people who provide us with water, electricity, safety, jobs, food, etc. Take it all away and see... wouldn't people then be very eager to make themselves depend on others too?
Besides, I don't want just "anyone". I want someone who can see that a mutual "dependency", while it may look unhealthy might not be so bad (within reason). By trusting someone you don't know (and we never truly know anyone 100%, not even family), we also make life a bit more exciting. It gives us something to work on, to pursue. It gives our life more meaning. Doesn't it?
